Who are we anyway?

I served tonight with a congregation full of the unfortunate. They were full of the extremely broken. They were weighed down by their baggage. They had baggage yet to come. This congregation has sinned in ways we could never fathom, fallen in directions in which some of us have never even stumbled, and have done things that SHOULD HAVE caused three girls in their twenties to be a bit more aware of their surroundings. They were full of the redeemed.

I met a man named Daniel tonight and he told me a brief testimony of his life. It involved drugs, it involved bad habits, and it involved mistakes. He looked me in the face and said "I heard the word of the Lord four months ago and I haven't been the same since." Daniel is very rough around the edges, as were some of his friends that came along for the ride tonight. Their faces showed exactly what they had seen, where they had been, and what they had gone through in order to get to where they are today. The unusual thing about Daniel and his friends was the fire in their eyes. They had the most beautiful passion for the Lord that I have ever seen in my twenty two years.

We drove around Memphis to deliver meals to the homeless in various places. We would hang around and talk with them and then pray over them afterward. It was a humbling experience in and of itself... So much so that I cannot even begin to muster up the words to justify the exact emotion that I felt when I saw where these people were living. In an old abandoned freezer behind a building that was once a fast food restaurant, in front of a closed down Rite Aid, underneath bridges on main roadways in downtown Memphis. People LIVE there. Every single day. One man, Nathaniel, took his food and walked away... We thought he was leaving so we tried to say good bye but he turned around and said "I'm not leaving, I just want to eat in peace with my Lord." The thankfulness, the humility, and the personable conversations were nothing short of some of the most beautiful blessings I have experienced since moving to Memphis.

In these moments of being around these people, other broken people such as myself, I couldn't help but question who in the world I thought I was. Who am I to believe that I was ever better than anyone just because of the lifestyle I live in comparison to theirs? Who am I to walk by a homeless man on the street and feel bad FOR HIM because HE lives on the side of the street? I am just as unfortunate.

Daniel shared a beautiful picture with us tonight from Isaiah 6. It talks about Isaiah's vision of God and the seraphim behind him. Angels who have never sinned once in their life, standing behind our Lord of Lords. The most unreal thing about this vision is the fact that these angels took their wings and covered up their faces and covered up their feet because they were in the presence of God.

He also talked about Zephaniah when it says that we will literally be silenced one day by the love of God because He will be singing over us. All I could think about is being in awe of a human being's voice... There have been times when I have been so amazed by someone's voice that I am literally speechless. Daniel said "Think of the best voice in the world and multiply it by 3 million... That's our God." 3 million doesn't even cover it... I can't wait to hear you sing, Father.

I just feel like this experience changed a big part of me... I have so much more to learn in this life and it all starts with realizing how unclean I am. Who am I anyway?

God calls Himself "I am" in Exodus when He is telling Moses about his calling... My pastor was talking about this instance this past Sunday... If He is I AM then we are I AM NOT. And then he said something that I feel will stick with me forever, and I think I'll end on this because it just says enough.

"I AM NOT... But I know I AM."